I've been blogging about my 2nd trip to Italy but now I am back to day to day life.
My son finished his AT hike on Saturday July 20th. He hiked 2,186 miles in 115 days. Amazing.
The last week was very stressful as he was exhausted. I met him on the trail in Caratunk, Maine and we stayed at a little motel in Bingham. He needed a bug-free night of sleep. He was a mess. My heart broke for him. He looked as though he broke out in hives but they were bug bites!
I fed him. He showered...twice. The next morning I drove him back to the trailhead. It was heart wrenching to drive away but he needed to do what he needed to do.
Motherhood! Oy vey!
I am at a difficult time in parenting with my boys being 16 and 18. I feel confused and lost in some ways. They are growing up and I am not sure how to mother them anymore.
They want to be treated like adults but they aren't adults. They want my help and then in an instant, they resent my help. I can't seem to get it right.
They assume I am some superhuman being but I am just a person. They don't realize that mothers were once girls and then we grew up.
I am sad. I miss having boys.
I don't doubt their love for me but things have changed and I am confused.
I don't like confusion. I am not at my best this week.
A part of me wants to throw in the towel and say, "Yeah fine, do whatever you want" but that would be a lie.
A part of me wants to say, "Do you have any idea what I've done for you?" but they won't understand it.
You hear about the empty-nest syndrome but what about the "nestfullofkidspretendingtobeadultswhodriveyouinsane" syndrome?
Speaking of my sons, they are out playing ultimate frisbee with friends and the house is quiet. It is lovely. I am going to enjoy this quiet.
It's good to be blogging again. :)
